the parentals....

my parents arrived in town yesterday....they are here until Wednesday...

As much as I complain about them to my friends, it is nice to see them. By tomorrow evening though I'm sure I'll ready for them to be back on the plane! So far things have gone well...Although they have called me a bit of a snob. Therefore I bit my tongue when they suggested TGIFridays for dinner. ugh. I'm off from the bar tonight and Mrs. Jesus is cooking them dinner. I've given my friends a list of topics that are off limits. Clearly they know I'm gay but they don't need to know the full details.... Should be interesting what kind of stuff will come up. I'm finding myself push the boundaries a little bit with them. Testing the waters...we'll see how much they can take...

They even came to the bar briefly last night....was a little nervous but they handled it quite well... not sure if they noticed a certain barback's t-shirt that said "Mary Had A Little Lamb" with an accompanying cartoon of Mary getting her pussy plowed by a lamb. Nice.....BTW - my mom's name is Mary...

anyway...

Sorry for the downer post last week or two weeks ago or however long it's been...things are betterish. Things with the new guy are going well and so i've been smiling a lot as a result of that. The other stuff is still there, but gaining new perspectives on it. The new guy is helping with that too - he's really challenging me in the best possible ways. Plus he doesn't let me get away with being down on myself - that's a good thing. He even has me believing some of the good things he says about me. Why can believing good things about yourself be so hard to hear? accept? believe? Shame how we allow our self-esteem to get so battered like that....

Anyway....it's going well...i'm terrified about this whole process but exhilarated at the same time.... there are a lot of things about him that is brand new territory for me and contrary to what I used to want. Over the past year though I've really began to question what it is that I want and I'm re-exploring. Keeping - or trying to keep - an open mind. If it doesn't work out I hope to at least walk away with a better sense of who I am and what I need. So far it's been amazing and my open mind has just been blown away!

(an added plus is this is without a doubt the best sex i've ever had in my life)