Thursday, November 10, 2005

Squirrels on Crack?

So i found this article about how squirrels in London are supposedly becoming addicted to crack.

The article claims:

"Crack squirrels are a recognised phenomena in the US. They are known to live in parks frequented by addicts in New York and Washington DC. The squirrels have attacked park visitors in their frenzied search for their next fix."

Okay, am I just not hanging out in the right crack parks or what? I have never seen a crack-addicted squirrel before or even heard of one. A quick google search just revealed more London sources of the same article and even one from the non-news-spinning-folk at Fox News , but nothing on the actual "recognised phenomena" in the US.

The article also claims:

"It was ill-looking and its eyes looked bloodshot but it kept on desperately digging. It was almost as if it was trying to find hidden crack rocks."

Now I ask you, how can you tell if a squirrel's eyes are bloodshot?

Can anyone find a source to confirm crack addicted squirrels in DC???

(oh here's some news from a more reputable source - Muhammad Ali thinks Bush is crazy)


At 4:11 AM, Blogger boodler said...

found you via DCBlog....crack squirrels is absolutely crazy! hard to believe. haha wow

At 1:56 PM, Blogger Dudley said...

Color me crazy but don't squirrels inherently act like they're on crack . . . anyone but me notice that one??? Are London news sources that hard up for newsworthy stuff? Or perhaps the writer of the news article was just channeling - maybe jonesin' for his next fix as well???? Next thing we'll read from our neighbors across the pond are London squirrels lack of dental hygiene . . . It's classic projection, I'm tellin ya!

At 2:53 PM, Blogger Phil said...

They are easy to spot. Simply look for squirrels who are constantly paranoid that other squirrels are out to get their nuts, or if you see them constantly cleaning their nest without sleep, and beware if a squirrel approaches you and offers you sex in exchange for 'one more hit'.

At 10:25 PM, Blogger DCdramaGrrls said...

wouldnt they be skinny and trying to do odd jobs?

WHAT?!? this is crazy!

At 1:45 PM, Blogger Phil said...

Yes, dcdrama that it also a sign. Sleep deprived and malnourished, these squirrels are certain to be seen trying to convince park-goers to let them paint their house, sweep their driveway, etc.

Usually the squirrel will take your cash, and never arrive to do the job promised.


Post a Comment

<< Home